Wanted: Hot Lesbian Following
Dear Chickbait:
I have a seriously devastating problem: no hot lesbian groupies. That's right, you heard me. I am a lesbian and I have a band, a semi-quasi good band, and I have NO lesbian groupies. Much less hot ones. I need to feel the LOVE!
Chickbait, oh wisest-of-the-wise: How on earth do I amass a proper lesbian following for my band? What do I do? I'M DESPERATE!
Desperately,
Girl without Lesbian Groupies.
Dear Girl without Lesbian Groupies,
The simple solution to this problem would be to get Chickbait, or a suitable alternative to attend all of your bands events. Ok, who am I kidding, there is no one who compares to Chickbait. Let's face it, you want chicks, you apparently need bait. You can only hope that once you get the bait there, that the chicks will swarm and continue to swarm even if the bait becomes otherwise engaged and doesn't make it to the shows. At some point, it would probably be best that Chickbait left the scene, otherwise the hot girls might fail to pay attention to the band and might just never realize how good it really is since there attention will be focused elsewhere.
Find a close alternative to Chickbait and try your luck. Surely you know one woman who is hot and irresistible who could at least attempt this task for you. If she can't do the job, I'd recommend performing half-naked or studying the fine art of being your own Chickbait. This isn't a fast solution, but you just might be able to pull it off. If all else fails, give me a call, surely I can bring you a few hot lesbian groupies. Oh, and never, ever, ever let the hot lesbian groupies know that you are desperate that won't help your cause at all!
-Chickbait
I have a seriously devastating problem: no hot lesbian groupies. That's right, you heard me. I am a lesbian and I have a band, a semi-quasi good band, and I have NO lesbian groupies. Much less hot ones. I need to feel the LOVE!
Chickbait, oh wisest-of-the-wise: How on earth do I amass a proper lesbian following for my band? What do I do? I'M DESPERATE!
Desperately,
Girl without Lesbian Groupies.
Dear Girl without Lesbian Groupies,
The simple solution to this problem would be to get Chickbait, or a suitable alternative to attend all of your bands events. Ok, who am I kidding, there is no one who compares to Chickbait. Let's face it, you want chicks, you apparently need bait. You can only hope that once you get the bait there, that the chicks will swarm and continue to swarm even if the bait becomes otherwise engaged and doesn't make it to the shows. At some point, it would probably be best that Chickbait left the scene, otherwise the hot girls might fail to pay attention to the band and might just never realize how good it really is since there attention will be focused elsewhere.
Find a close alternative to Chickbait and try your luck. Surely you know one woman who is hot and irresistible who could at least attempt this task for you. If she can't do the job, I'd recommend performing half-naked or studying the fine art of being your own Chickbait. This isn't a fast solution, but you just might be able to pull it off. If all else fails, give me a call, surely I can bring you a few hot lesbian groupies. Oh, and never, ever, ever let the hot lesbian groupies know that you are desperate that won't help your cause at all!
-Chickbait
posted by chickbait at 11:02 AM
3 Comments:
Chickbait, have you ever considered hiring yourself out to lesbians seeking a lesbian groupie following? There may be a lucrative career there. Not to mention the thousands of Chickbait groupies who would be fulfilled by the opportunity to follow you around to your bookings. Just a thought.
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